Sure You Can Ask Me a Personal Question (Imitation poem)

Sure You Can Ask Me a Personal Question 

(This is an imitation poem of Diane Burn's poem of the same name.) 

How do you do?

No, I’m not Christian.

No, not Jewish.

No, I’m not Muslim either. I’m an Atheist.

No, not a Satan worshiper.

No, not angry with God.

No, not a Nazi.

No, not a witch.

No, I don’t eat babies!

Yes, an Atheist.

Oh?

You heard we drink goat’s blood?

From your pastor, huh?

I just want to sin, huh?

We are devil spawn?

Let me guess. Church?

Oh, you heard our lives lack meaning?

I find meaning everywhere.

Oh, so you think we have no sense of wonder?

The universe inspires great awe.

Oh, so you think we have no morals?

We do good because it is right.

Yes, my life is fulfilling without god.

It’s real sweet of you to be concerned.

No, I don’t want you to save me.

No, I won’t change my mind in a foxhole.

No, I don’t think I am smarter than you.

Thank you.  You don’t seem evil either.

I don’t think anyone will ever know 

all the answers.

No, I don’t like Bill Maher.

Yeah. Sure. Loves me.

Uh-huh. Yeah. Accept him. Uh-huh. Forgiveness.

Save me. Yeah. Sure. Uh-huh. Eternal hellfire.

No, I don’t want to outlaw religion.

Yes, I do want it completely out of government.

Some of us don’t believe.

This ain’t no heavenly access test.

This is all there is.